prompt: Southview Boarding School isn’t a castle and Phil Lester isn’t royalty, but he has everything. His father owns the school, he’s popular, has the best room, gets all the best treatment – there are very few things that aren’t handed to him on a platter. Dan is a cleaner/Phil’s personal maid there, and he isn’t as lucky. Everyone seems to take an aversion to the outsider, including Phil (at first).-
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warnings: smut (masturbation lmao), swearing, alcohol stuff and (v v brief) mentions of drugs
i cant believe this got as smutty as it did brb gonna douse myself in holy water
the storyline’s like……. finally beginning to move on now
enjoy!!
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Eleven
Days go by. Phil begins to see less and less of Liam, Freddie and Violet, spinning more and more excuses about ‘English coursework’ and ‘I promised Noah I’d go see his drama thing tonight’ and ‘oh fuck okay listen I’d love to but Ed’s only given me until tomorrow to finish this essay and you know what he’s like about overdue stuff.”
Okay, the drama thing was actually true. They’re putting on some performance of Mary Poppins, and while Phil doesn’t really think that’s the most imaginative or interesting play idea they could have come up with, seeing Noah prance around in a chimney sweep costume covered in fake soot certainly is entertaining. He’s sure those pictures he’d managed to take of him during the ‘Chim-Chim-Cher-ee’ dance are going to look great on his Snapchat story tonight.
“Did you like it?” Noah had asked him after the production when Phil had hung around backstage, watching the audience pouring out of the drama studio, leaving twenty six exhausted A-Level drama students and rows and rows of empty chairs behind them.
“Pretty impressive,” Phil nods. “Though last time I watched the Walt Disney version, I’m fairly certain there was no rap battle halfway through,” he pauses, “or drug jokes during the ‘Spoonful-of-sugar’ song.”
Noah rolls his eyes. “That’s the point of it. It’s- like, the modern adaptation of children’s Disney films. Pretty cool, huh?”
“Yeah, sure,” Phil shrugs, before hesitating. “Although if you’re going down that route, I dread to think what you guys would make of Alice in Wonderland.”
“That’s certainly an idea.” Noah chuckles, wiping a smudge of soot off of his cheek. “Maybe you could play the Cheshire Cat. And Liam could play that white rabbit with poor time management. Or you could both be Tweedledum and Tweedledee.”
Phil rather thinks Liam’s better suited to a character like the evil walrus instead of the white rabbit, but he doesn’t mention that.